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Showing posts with label self esteem. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self esteem. Show all posts

LOVE THE HATERS

LOVE THE HATERS

Yes I do.  I love my haters and I will share that typically those who are “hating” or critical of others really do desire to be loved.  There is something down deep inside of each of us that longs to be accepted and  feel good enough, and when hate comes to the surface it usually defines deep insecurities or unresolved issues within a person.  The ability to be motivated or happy by or for another is replaced with bitterness, jealousy, and to the point of “hating” a person for their accomplishments.  Because I realize that there are underlying factors involved with “hating”, I can look past comments and know that it is not about me when my haters come to calling.  Lately, I have received lots of negative comments, and especially when I share motivational posters that feature me in fitness wear or bathing suits.  If I allowed the negative posts I receive to negatively impair me as a person, I really do not have any business being an internet personality.  I have been in this industry for thirty years, and have read and heard my share of negative as well as the positive.


The only thing in this life I can control is me, and I let go of all the rest.  What I share with you comes with pure intention to motivate you to live a healthy life, and if that is not well received that is the chance I take, and the positive will always outweigh the negative in my opinion.  The recent “hating” on my body and boobs with a post focus/motivation  to live a healthy lifestyle, exercise, eat healthy,  or be happy with self is a clear demonstration of people that are not happy with “self” and feel the need to project and vent their frustrations.  The sad part about hating on the internet is the people acting out the behavior do not know the circumstances or life journey of the person they are criticizing.  Let’s use breast augmentation as an example in general and the possibility that the woman making this choice is doing so for cancer reconstructive purposes, or has been involved in an auto accident which has disfigured her breast, or to feel better about herself by gaining a more proportionate figure, or to regain fuller breasts post pregnancy of one or more births and breast feeding her blessings in life, and the list of reasons can go on and on.  I had a girlfriend who was out for a jog and an unleashed dog attacked her, leaped at her breast and pulled it off her chest, which took months of reconstructive repair.  We all need to realize, accept, and appreciate that personal choices belong to each person and that it does not make that person fake or a “bad” example.  In fact, it could be this person’s life story that can reach out and help others in similar situations.  It really comes down to if you do not have anything nice to say, do not say anything at all. 


Wouldn’t life be grand if all of us were pro-positive of each other, supportive, motivating and complimentary?  The sad truth is that life is not that way, and within this imperfect world we are imperfect people trying the best we can to deal with unfair issues in this life.  That is the point of it all to be happy, and become a better person each day through our journey.  That is not accomplished riding in the “hate” wagon of life.  So whether it is a new house, car, clothes, body, face or your life in general, haters will hate because you possess something they don’t.  Their inability to figure out how to obtain happiness within their own self and life can create a very upset and angry person who copes with frustration through “hating”.  They deal with personal feelings of inadequacy after comparing themselves with others by turning themselves on what they think is making them feel upset…Me, You, Us.



Understanding the psychology of people has helped me a great deal in my journey of life, and has enabled me to develop a “turtle shell” skin that shields me from the negative drama in life.  Also, knowing that there is a lot to be said and appreciated with that old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”.  I think it also comes down to maturity and realizing that life is too short and precious to not be surrounded by positive and to choose to be positive in life.  Loving my haters is a decision to persevere through adversity, and a choice to continue motivating no matter what the cost.  Also, I do wish for their health and happiness deep down and regardless of the negative, I get people talking and learning through the process.  That is a great thing! 




Thanks for stopping by my Blog, hope you enjoy the content, and if you have not become a follower yet, I would love to see your face on my friend's list.  If you are inspired, LIKE my entry, leave a comment and I look forward to responding!



Darla

The Mental Side Of Fitness Continued

The Mental Side Of Fitness Continued

Think your only support is in the house or only with your friends…WRONG…It is healthy to have your own interests……
Are you waiting around for your family to be active with you….waiting for spouse, teen, etc….guess what…YOU are in charge of YOU. I realize that being by yourself can be a bummer, feel lonely, and even scary…hell…I have more fun working out with a friend, but it is absolutely up to you to love yourself enough to make “ME” time for you regardless of your couch potatoes. Check out the classes at your local gym or recreational facility….You have nothing but good health to gain from the experience. Are you single and using the EXCUSE of… I have no one that will go with me to work out at the gym, or walk. This kind of thinking will never get YOU going. It is important to LOVE yourself enough to do it for YOU….eat healthy, enjoy exercise for the sake of moving your body…forget about waiting for someone else…think about it….that other someone may never come through for you…then what…give up…continue to make that your EXCUSE (yes, I am a hard ass here)….I say STOP today, put on your walking shoes and get out and absorb some vitamin D, breathe some fresh air, and MOVE!!! Love yourself THAT MUCH!!!


Reach out to others if your partner is not motivating you…..
OK…as much as you may want that perfect workout partnership….guess what…it may take time to happen. It is really OK and a fabulous idea to reach out to friends that share your interest in getting healthy, and getting in some great “ME” time with someone other than whom you live. You will probably be pleasantly surprised on how this will actually spice up your relationship because you will have new fun experiences to share. Do you feel guilty leaving your loved one behind or like you need permission to do something without them? Why? How healthy is this type of thinking…..not very….if it is keeping you from getting healthy. You will have to be your own motivation here, face any insecurity or fear, put the excuses in the trash, and call a friend today. If you do not have a friend that will help you be accountable and visa versa, try checking out your local gym for classes, or recreational facilities. I say start today by putting on your walking shoes, and MOVE…..enjoy the moment, take some deep breathes, appreciate your surroundings, and SMILE!!!!

Be strong in light of the pizza being offered….
You want chicken salad and he or she wants pizza….do not succumb to the temptations of your non supportive partner. This will be hands down the HARDEST part of getting healthy especially if you are accustomed to eating the same unhealthy foods together to begin with. Most pizza places also have salad bars and even deliver….imagine that. Stick to your guns, and set the example of good health with your nutrition. I realize it will not seem fair to have two different ways of eating going on at the same time…but think about it…YOU are the one who wanted the change, right? OK…so your eventual benefit will include an overall health improvement inside and out, and there is no greater reward than that:)







Unable to feel good about self….
This can be a difficult one. You may be in a very down place mentally, unable to get self motivated, and may not even want to see anyone. In this situation, start by letting some nice sunshine in your home, and take the first step to call a friend. There is nothing like the wisdom and support of a good friend to get you on the road to feeling better. You may also want to get in touch with your doctor for a few counseling sessions. It may take a while, but YOU are worth it. You are worth being happy and healthy….ask your friend for help in keeping you accountable. Take your chats outside for a power walk/talk…..a few sessions like this should boost your motivation and hopefully help get you on the path to feeling the best you have ever been!!!!







Talk yourself out of going to the gym…
Why Why Why!!!! This is what I call a big EXCUSE, and not acceptable…I am being the accountability police here. I can’t go because my work, my husband, my wife, my child, my chores, my school, blah blah blahhhh already. These are usually the same people that are getting in the TV programs, not missing social events, and simply wasting time doing other things while life is passing them by. I say if you have an extra hour watching TV….and usually it is hoursssssssssssssss, if honestly added up over the course of the week, you HAVE the time to exercise. Time to get honest, stop the EXCUSES, and get healthy!!!

TV over fitness…
I can’t emphasis this one enough….this society is technology driven, and media based. The television offers so much at the touch of the fingertips….let me ask you are you visiting the FIT TV channel and joining in on a fun workout? The answer to that question is usually NO. I challenge each and everyone of you to limit your TV watching to one hour per day for just ONE WEEK, and get to know yourself, be active, talk with your family, husband, wife, your girlfriend/boyfriend, meet with friends, take walks, play with your pets, and enjoy being active and real quality time that very often gets pushed to the side. After that fabulous walk and conversation, pull out a fun board game and laugh laugh laugh. Life is too short not to. I would love to hear how this experiment goes....


Stay Healthy!!!!!





















Darla:)