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Showing posts with label life. Show all posts

SET YOUR BOUNDARIES

It took me many years through this journey of life to learn how to set boundaries and even what the heck that meant. Think of a boundary as a shield of protection around you and one that will provide health and happiness. Go deeper with the meaning and understand that boundaries are an important part of self-love and not allowing others to treat you in a way that is not healthy for you and your life. When boundary setting is not demonstrated for us as we grow up into “adult world”, the struggle to understand how to implement them can be difficult, and sometimes scary. The sacrifice of self to the point of mistreatment by others can be the result if boundary setting is not put into place. Boundaries make a clear statement of what is not allowed when it comes to each person, and when those lines are crossed, it is a painful process for the one that has been wronged in that way. Sometimes clear communication of the boundary can resolve the conflict and other instances will require radical choices of removing ourselves from the situation altogether. The most uncomfortable part of a broken boundary is the trust that was there before has now been chipped away into doubt.

I am all for doing whatever it takes to learn how to set boundaries: counseling, support groups, church guidance, etc. Once the gift of boundary setting has been established in life, it provides a confidence, strength, and overall feeling of worthiness never experienced before, and it will seem as if life has begun in a truly healthy way for the first time. Once boundaries have been set, it is important to honor yourself by remaining true to those decisions and not allowing anyone or anything to rob you of your shield of self-love. Even the best of boundary setter can backslide and be tempted into old patterns of trusting someone to the point of letting down a boundary, but in the end it leads only to anger, resentment, and hurt. Along with the pain will be the shame felt personally for allowing it to happen in the first place and feeling the sting of failure to ourselves. Boundaries teach us how to respect ourselves enough to know how we want to be treated, and further what is acceptable in our lives. Boundaries remove the doormats that we as people may have once been, and replaced with a security door of emotional ability to conquer any circumstance placed in its’ way.

Emotional health is a large part of our physical health and discussing topics like boundary setting are at the top of my list when it comes to being a healthy person. The journey has been a tough one, but the positive result of learning how to set boundaries has created the person that I am today and I love myself for that.

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Stay Healthy!

Darla Leal, Fit at 50

COMMITMENT MATTERS

As Valentine’s Day is upon us tomorrow, I think about commitment and how it not only matters in my marriage but also in my fitness and overall health. They both take dedication and work right? Think about that: if you cheat on your marriage, it will not work…if you cheat on your health, it will not work…see what I mean. In order to maintain a happy, healthy relationship, it takes commitment, effort and work on a daily and consistent basis.

In this journey of life, I have learned what I do and do not want, and I certainly have found a gem in my husband and cherish our relationship as top priority. I feel the same way about my fitness and realize that my life is a precious gift worthy of my time and attention to reduce the risk of illness and maintain a healthy quality of life. Commitment is a word that I do not use lightly and is a promise that I will maintain my relationship in a healthy way with my hubby and with myself.

Really, I do not need a special Hallmark day to tell me that, because every day is Valentine’s Day in my life with my honey and my health. I treat both with tender loving care, appreciation, time and attention. Commitment to the things that matter is important and believe me, there are plenty of “busy things” in life that just do not matter. I like that motivational saying “when you are committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results”. I believe in seeing positive results in my marriage and health and if I do not take the healthy action steps to make that happen, that is on me. I have worked too hard and long in my life to not make the most of each day, and appreciate what good health and true love feels like.

I will be fifty soon, and it has taken half my lifetime to reach the maturity of emotional, spiritual and physical well-being that I understand today. The bumpy road along the way was difficult, but through patience, perseverance, and commitment to want more for me in every aspect of life, the journey was meant to be and is always a “to be continued” story. The importance of commitment is also patience through the process as nothing happens overnight. There is no such thing as here today and gone tomorrow and rushing life to get no-where is certainly not on any page that I am writing.

I dedicate this Blog to the love of my life, my best friend, prayer partner, and greatest support I have ever known. To my husband: I love you “Forever and a Day” and every day is Valentine’s Day with you.

Thanks for stopping by my Blog, hope you enjoy the content, and if you have not become a follower yet, I would love to see your face on my friend's list. If you are inspired, LIKE my entry, leave a comment and I look forward to responding!

StayHealthy!

Darla

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I wanted to take the time to wish all of YOU a very Merry Christmas and an upcoming safe and Happy New Year. WOW…can you believe how the time has gone by in a blink? Life truly is like that you know and it is so important to cherish every moment, and really take in the meaning of things. We get so caught up in busy, busy, busy, that even relaxing has become a stressful event…WHAT???

Believe me, I used to be one of those busy people who felt that time was utilized for work and if I was not doing something productive every minute then I was wasting valuable time. This can really create a self- inflicted guilt trip that dares a person to even place their backside on the sofa for a minute…back then, it caused too much anxiety. So, I buzzed around like a bee all the time and I did not realize how much of life I was missing. I was too busy trying to make a living and not make a life. I truly thank God for my older, wiser, better self who has slowed the pace of my life down to a healthy balance and I can now see the world and everything all around me with much more clarity for many years now. It is absolutely awesome to take deep full breathes and not feel on edge about this and that, and let go of thing that really do not matter in the big scheme of life.

Lately, my husband and I have been surrounded by people in crisis through illness, death, and job loss. Our hearts have been touched, pained, and our knees bent in prayer for those that we care about. It is times like these that life does not make sense, and even can provide a fear and a desperate cry for protection of our lives, relationship, finances, and all things meaningful in this life. There is no amount of money that replaces a person, and that is when it is realized that all that busyness is for nothing. It is so important to have a heart of gratitude, and thankfulness because there are people out there who are praying for the very things that I/you/we have that are taken for granted. I know this sounds like heavy stuff, but it really is just a share of how important it is to realize how important life is…it is truly a GIFT and there are no guarantees of how long the gift of being here will last. I do know that taking care of this gift of life is what I am supposed to do, and taking care of my physical, nutritional, emotional and spiritual health are all a part of that plan. That is what I share with you here on the Blog…ME to MOTIVATE you, and if I have touched one person, inspired, encouraged, or helped in some way to better the quality of life for someone…then I have accomplished my goal.

As I sit here typing my thoughts to you, I wonder what you are thinking, feeling, and how your life is going? Are you caught up in “too busy” and not making time to take care of you, missing out on family and friend opportunities, not making a call to that person that has been on your mind, and other meaningful things that you think about but are pushed aside each day because that busy voice keeps taking over? We never want to be in a position of regret and saying, I wish I would have done this or that, because at that moment it is too late. Life is about taking those important things and doing them now. Tossing the “too busy card” is a necessity to have a healthy life and that is really what this post is about.

I understand the importance of work, but we all have the ability to create a healthy balance of life through choices, changes of priority, and our overall mindset of what we think and feel about life. My wish and gift to all of you this Christmas, is that you all step back and really allow yourself to relax and get into the moment, develop a heart of gratitude, see with the eyes of a child and play with such freedom of non-care that it is contagious, laugh until your belly hurts, and be REAL in your sharing with your spouse, family and friends. Adapt such a balanced, healthy lifestyle that everyone will be asking YOU what you are doing to get healthy, because it all starts between the ears and shines through with your actions. Take good care and Merry Christmas!

ME and My Girls

Stay Healthy

Darla

NOTHING GOOD HAPPENS FAST

I have learned in life to take things a little slower, to be patient, a great listener, and to enjoy the moment. All this rushing around can make my head spin, increase my stress levels, and I miss way too much of what is important in life. I implement this philosophy in my workouts, food intake, work and play, in the bedroom, and I know I am missing some other categories, but I will share those as I am inspired.

I like to share that “nothing good happens fast” with my clients if they try to rush a move and I usually get a chuckle, as the mind can go thinking about other things, but I always pull everyone back to the exercise, of course enjoying the humor right along with them in that brief instant…it is all about life and having fun with fitness. Now, think about an exercise and what the body needs and how benefited the muscles are by focused, slow, well executed contractions. Before I lift a weight, I create a two part motion to the exercise by putting my mind on that muscle, slightly contracting that muscle, then executing the contraction of the muscle with the lift.

This creates the best environment for muscle growth and reduces the chance of injury as I am not just throwing weights around without purpose. It truly is about going about exercise with purpose and knowing that muscle growth is a slow process. Remember…nothing good happens fast, so in this want for lean muscle on the body, patience is very important and “GOOD things come to those who wait”.

Moving on to my food intake and eating slowly. If I have worked my butt off preparing a fabulous healthy meal, I am going to take my sweet time eating and savoring every bite of that work. I will not be one of those gulping my food down remaining hungry because I did not allow my brain to register with my stomach that I am full. This is an area where many do not realize that it takes at least 20 minutes for the brain to communicate satiety to the stomach, and sadly too large of portions are consumed because of eating too quickly. This type of continued eating pattern is one of the many causes of obesity, in addition to the unhealthy processed products that are consumed as well. Nothing good happens fast in the eating department, and in fact, the slower the better and for at least 20 minutes. This gives me time to enjoy my food, have lengthy and meaningful conversation, and relax during my meal.

I also take things slower to reduce stress in my life. I used to be a “yes” girl

as I have shared in the past plus having an A1 personality type. I would busy myself so much, always say “yes” to everyone, and overload my calendar to the point where I had to be fast just to keep up with all of my commitments. Let’s just say I needed a big crash in my life to bring that to a screeching halt. I look back at all that and can say in a big way…nothing good happens fast, and all that madness can cause YUCK chemical release in the body to produce stress and anxiety, which of course can lead to illness, burn out, depression, and that whole “life feels bigger than me” overwhelm. Fast forward to the new Darla taking life slow, breathing, calendaring according to what works for me, and living a healthy “balanced” life. When life feels too fast, what is the point of that and I truly do not want to miss out on what life is gifting me.

I am going to the bedroom because it is a part of life, health and fitness. Now, when I talk about intimacy and sex, please realize that I am referencing within the bonds of marriage, but do not think I am sitting here judging people as that is not for me to do. Now, the point I am trying to make with sex is again “nothing good happens fast.” I am a woman of almost 50 and I am sure that my fellow gal readers out there will agree, that our bodies go through changes that can leave us feeling frustrated, and not understanding what the heck is going on. This goes for men as well, and I am talking physically and emotionally. The key to a happy healthy sex life is to take things slow, be patient, embrace the changes that are occurring and do the best with what we have. Sometimes that means being very creative and how can that be a bad thing…right? Instead of frustration and thinking things should happen fast, toss that thinking out the window and accept the new body that responds to slow, and know that the mind and body work together to produce fabulous results.

The wonderful thing about “Nothing Good Happens Fast” is that it can be applied to so many things in life as I shared above, and so much more. I am a planner and a processor of thoughts, feelings, and life decisions. The “nothing good happens fast” philosophy works well for me here as it slows me down to think before I jump, make a pro-con list if needed, hear feedback from my hubby, family or friends, and helps me to make decisions without fear. If things are taken slowly, I feel better and more confident about the choices that I make. The important thing is taking care of ME through a healthy mind and body process that works for me, and taking things slower just works.

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IN YOUR FACE MOTIVATION

This one was FUNNY!!

BLOG DEDICATION: I dedicate this Blog to my BEST friend, my biggest fan, cheerleader, and the one who helps me appreciate and take life at a slower pace...My Fabulous Husband who I wish a very Happy Anniversary next week. I love you "Forever and a Day".

Thanks for stopping by my Blog, hope you enjoy the content, and if you have not become a follower yet, I would love to see your face on my friend's list. If you are inspired, LIKE my entry, leave a comment and I look forward to responding!

Stay Healthy~ Darla

The Value of Time

Our New Puppy ~ Roxie

Hubby and I were reading our daily devotional about the meaning of time and really how that equates to love. What really shouted loud for me was this fabulous share:

“Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can't make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you'll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. It is not enough to just say relationships are important; we must prove it by investing time in them. Words alone are worthless. "My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action." Relationships take time and effort, and the best way to spell love is "T-I-M-E.”

It is this kind of paragraph that stops me in my tracks and makes me appreciate the value of time even more. I zero in on “you can make more money, but you can’t make more time”, and “Your time is your life”… aren’t these such AH-HA statements to think about. The reason I share such a personal blog today is that I want you to know, and I am sure you have heard this many times…it is not about having the best of everything, but making the BEST of everything you have. I would have to say that this really attributes huge to my living a healthy lifestyle, and realizing that I am enough, my funds are enough, my car and home are enough, time I spend in the gym is enough, and all the things that I am blessed with are ENOUGH. Knowing this allows me to relax, spend quality time with hubby, family and friend relationships, and to really let go of so much stress that can be created by the “Not Good Enough” mentality.

It is also being comfortable in this/my skin, and not having to compare myself to others. I am the type of person that can celebrate the success of my family and friends and not be down in the dumps if I am not at their financial status. What kind of friend would I be if I secretly felt bitterness, jealousy, and other ugly negative mind games that spell out hypocrite and surely does not fit a healthy mind or life…I could not define myself as a friend that is for sure.

Time is so valuable that no amount of money or price tag can be placed on it, and that tells me just how important it is NOT TO WASTE IT. It also tells me that I should be living the BEST life with my time, being the best I can be to myself and other important people in my life. Quality time and all the good and meaningful things I do in that quality time is healthy. Loving Darla daily through exercise and healthy foods is time well spent. Let me go further and share that my job as a personal trainer/consultant/coach is so enjoyable because it is giving the gift of my time, never to get back, but given with genuine care and complete attention to each of my clients, and I feel really great about that. Helping people with my time is healthy for them and healthy for me. It is such a great team relationship that can truly be defined as quality time.

I think the most important part about time is not wasting it…it is such a gift and privilege to be given each day to celebrate all that TODAY is and will be. I think it would be a slap in God’s face to not appreciate the time given to me…I mean how can I waste such a gift as this. If you gave me a present, I would not throw it on the ground and not appreciate it. I look at life and time like that. How I spend my time makes for a healthy me, and realizing what that means, and how it makes me feels is pretty darn satisfying for this Stay Healthy Gal.

In Your Face MOTIVATIONS

Stay Healthy~ Darla

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SIMPLE IS HEALTHY

Simple is Healthy ~ Workouts Part 2

As promised, I am continuing my write about why I think “Simple is Healthy” and how I apply that to my life in all aspects. Of course, it is such a HUGE factor for me, and knew that I could not fit all I had to say in one piece being the chatter bug that I am, so had to break it up in a series of Blogs. If you read the first of the series, I covered my food and how keeping it Simple makes for healthier foods…an apple vs. some packaged product with fake apple substance in it for example…YUCK. I am dedicating this Blog to how I keep my workouts Simple and how that is absolutely HEALTHIER for me.

I am a down to earth, back to the basics, sticking to the foundation of exercise kind of gal. I do not need anything fancy to create a healthy body, and in fact enjoy the simplicity of an all over body weight program many times throughout the week. Also…my time…it is so important…please do not think that I spend hours in my studio pounding the weights to maintain my 48 year young self…..NOT. I keep that simple as well and dedicate one hour at least 5-6 days per week to get my Darla Sweat ON. That is it…if I am spending more time than that…what the heck am I doing and WHY for crying out loud. My body requires daily physical activity and healthy foods and feeling like I need to push my body to limits beyond requirements is unhealthy in my book. I consider working out a reward, a privilege and thankful that I can perform the exercises that I do with my new modified ME. I think when the balance of workout is tipped so far into an obsessive thought process, it can become a burden and a something I “have to do” instead of “I want to do it”. Think about this idea…maintaining healthy food intake so I do not have to work as hard or long in the gym…WHAT….YES, studies have shown that the body only requires a good focus of 30 minutes per day of QUALITY exercise to maintain a great physique. LIGHT BULB moment here and QUALITY workouts are a “want to” inclusion in my life to make exercise SIMPLE, and that is HEALTHY! So, if I remain consistent on my healthy food intake, I can shave down my gym time by at least 15 minutes and really complete what I have to do in 45minutes. WIN WIN…clicking of fitness gal trainer shoes…woo hoo.

There are so many ways to exercise the body, but think about the root of all exercise that stems from strength and stabilization…that is where I come from. If my strength and stabilization are not in order, I might as well forget having a healthy workout session and body for that matter. I am all about body balance, proper posture, positioning, form and technique, and positive and negative (concentric/eccentric) movements. Let’s say I have a postural deviation and need to work on my core strength, my simple focus will be on doing that, and progressing from there. I will not put my body at risk for injury by swinging this or that for hours on end, jumping here or there, and creating pain and suffering by performing movements that my body is just not ready for and may not be able execute properly even after I have come to my point of progressing forward. I feel like a “body whisperer” where I pay close attention to what my body says I can do and proceed with caution with those things that I should not be doing. I am not a “push through the pain” person or trainer…there is normal discomfort that comes from a workout and then there is that “not right” discomfort that should put a screeching halt on my workout and yours for that matter.

I can have a simple good exercise time with nothing but my body weight, a set of dumbbells and pull up bar…BINGO. I see squats, negative pull ups, overhead presses, bicep curls, triceps kickbacks, and core work in that program. Nothing fancy about what I do, just me executing simple controlled QUALITY moves for 30-60 minutes, getting a fabulous sweat on, and feeling accomplished when I am done. Getting back to the basics of exercise, and the base moves that ALL workouts stem from is the safest and simplest form of creating a healthy body for ME and has served me well for several years. I turn a deaf ear to the fads of fitness out there, especially if they are making unrealistic promises with risky movements that may send a once healthy body into a now I need rehab for an injury body. Keeping it simple, fun, QUALITY, and time efficient sums up my workouts to be HEALTHY and LIFETIME maintainable. That is what I am all about …Quality Life, Simple is Better, and Simple is definitely HEALTHY!

Enjoy my Stay Healthy recipe feature this month on SkinnyMs.com, a website dedicated to Health, Fitness and Success!

Stay Healthy Crock pot Chicken & Brown Rice on Skinny Ms

In Your Face MOTIVATIONS

Coming soon…I have been asked to provide a review for Ellie, a new online fitness clothes brand and I am very excited to share my personal and professional opinion next month in addition to providing a special offer for you!

Thanks to all my Stay Healthy Fitness Facebook Followers who contributed to the Stay Healthy Fitness Grocery List and this was a fun interactive project. I have put your selections together and created a printable PDF list for you…HAPPY STAY HEALTHY SHOPPING!

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Mardi Gra Fun with Hubby day before Super Bowl

Stay Healthy~ Darla

Receive My Stay Healthy Nutrition Guide as a Free Gift and Thank you when you donate to Stay Healthy Fitness...